Kung Jung Jr. — Oh, boy…

Hello folks, let’s chat… First we had to deal with Kung Jung Crazy playing nuclear games in his pajamas. Now, Kung Jr. is at the helm and he could possibly have less bricks in his wheelbarrow than pappy did. I saw a cartoon that had a red-faced Kung Jr. jumping up and down trying to reach the mark on a sign that read, “You must be at least this tall to start a nuclear war.” Yes, I laughed. And yes I do realize these folks are dangerous but if we don’t lighten up occasionally y’all, we’ll be as nutsy as, well, you know who.

The last time Daddy Kung got all crazy I became obsessed with questions no one else was asking. Like, why do they make their soldiers march like that—high kicking with their legs all straight and jerky? We had a band director in high school that had a similar style and we laughed ourselves silly at that boy. I asked Bubba if he thought that hurky jerky marching might be irritating those North Korean boys. After giving it considerable thought, Bubba said he felt sure it could get plenty uncomfortable, especially if a boy were sweating. I told him I read on the Internet that N. Korea was humid and hot during the summer months and freezing in the winter and Bubba said, “Same never mind—either way they’re liable to be chapped.”

Back then, while researching their peculiar marching style, I stumbled across a promising little military tool we were working on with the Brits. We were developing tiny remote-controlled robotic flies to use in various situations like locating terrorists and finding victims of natural disasters that might be buried under rubble. Well, I suggested they could also be trained to fly up those boys’ pants legs to loosen ‘em up a tad. Surely they’ve got those things working by now. I’m telling y’all, it’s worth a try. I remember when I sat down in my big-legged shorts near a pile of red ants. Hear me on this. I did me some high-stepping, too, but I couldn’t have stayed in formation had my life depended on it.

Hugs, Shellie