Have any of y’all subscribed to that cable channel, DOG TV? I’ve been looking into it for Dixie Belle. The poor thing is getting on up there in age and she just can’t get around like she once could. True story, the other day I saw a squirrel sneak up on her while she was napping by the back porch. If I’m lying, I’m dying. The squirrel was after a cracked pecan resting no more than a foot from Dixie’s hind legs. I saw it all but I didn’t have the heart to wake her. I suspect the old girl realizes that she’s lost a few steps. She doesn’t even try to catch squirrels anymore, but I figured knowing one snuck up on her would be a special kind of humiliating.
But, back to DOG TV. I streamed some of their special preview footage on my laptop to see if Dixie was interested. No, ma’am. There are three categories of shows and Dixie didn’t care for any of them. She slept through the relaxation clip, whined during playtime because the on-screen dogs wouldn’t share their ball—which seems like poor programming if you ask me, and she was otherwise occupied with a certain area of her anatomy during the exposure segment where she was supposed to get educated and introduced to new experiences. Epic fail.
On the other hand, she is showing some interest in learning to cook. It started when she saw that article about a new Panini press on the market—for dogs. It looks like a people sandwich press, but it makes doggie biscuits. I tried to tell Dixie they didn’t mean dogs were actually using the thing, but it was a hard sell what with DOG TV on in the background. She just turned up the volume and grinned at me. Have mercy. I hope she doesn’t turn into a Foodie. It’s a proven fact that dogs have absolutely no sense of time. And you know what that means. Right! Someone’s going to have to teach her to use the kitchen timer…